News from here, fun drinks, stuff you might like

Newsletter for July 2023

In this issue:

• News From Here

• Three Things You Might Like

• Cartoons + More

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News From Here

Unfortunate Arts and Crafts

My daughter Claire tends to get into some weird projects during the summer, and this year is no exception. One of her latest pastimes: Buying foam heads and then making them into… art? That’s not the right word, but I don’t know what is.  

Basically, you’ll come into the kitchen and encounter this.

Or it might be hanging out by the toaster. Judging you.

In another room, I happened upon this lovely scene.

Don’t try that on yourself.

These foam heads remind me of a “hair and makeup” toy we somehow STILL own, even though my kids are 17 and 20.

Every now and then, one of the kids will move this toy head around the house and it scares the bejesus out of you when you walk into a room.

And now we have more heads! Wonderful! I’ll sleep well at night knowing I might encounter this crew around any corner.

Dog Successfully Pulls Off Risky Fashion Move

We traveled to see family on the East Coast last week, and I was lucky to spend time with Frankie the pug. He was wearing a “belly belt” (male diaper that wraps around his body) to prevent him from marking things around the house.

I have to say, this little guy pulled it off. He was trotting around, confident as could be. Some dogs might think, “Shoot, I’m wearing a diaper,” but Frankie seemed to be saying, “Style and function unite in this fashion-forward belt!”

For a second it made you think, “I wish I had a stylish diaper, too!”

Anyway, good job, Frankie! Thank you for reminding us about the power of a confident attitude.

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Three Things You Might Like

#1: This funny video from Please Don’t Destroy. I mentioned these guys a few years ago, and since then they’ve started working with Saturday Night Live. Here’s a video they did about wellness, and you’ll find a lot more on their channel.

#2: Fake commercials by Tech Fusion. If you like my Bowl Game stories, you might like this “Tech Fusion” guy on Instagram. He makes funny commercials by picking a random product name, then picking a random film genre. The results are great. Here’s a commercial about Cheetos, presented in the style of a perfume ad.

#3: Non-alcoholic drinks. Sure, it’s nice to have a cocktail or a glass of beer or wine. But lately, alcohol has been making me dizzy (thanks, aging!). So I’ve been trying to come up with some fun non-alcoholic drinks.

Here’s what I’m enjoying…

I know these exact brands might not be available everywhere, but you get the basic idea. I like sparkling flavored water mixed with some sort of juice drink. If you want to get fancy, you can add fresh mint and/or slices of lemon or lime. It’s tasty, it’s bubbly, and it’s just fun to drink.

Do you enjoy any fun non-alcoholic drinks? Just reply or comment at the end of this email. I’d love to hear your ideas, and maybe I can share them in the next newsletter!

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Cartoons + More

Monday Motivation

As you’ve likely seen, I’ve been doing a series of “Monday Motivation” emails. The idea is to start your week with something short, funny, and (hopefully) helpful. I’m not sure how many I’ll do, but I have several more already planned. So watch for those and let me know what you think!

Subscription Offer

I want everyone to enjoy and share my work, which is why the vast majority of my content is free. But starting this month, I’m excited to offer a special experience for anyone who wants to become a paid subscriber. This short video explains the benefits.

I’ll be sending out the first paid subscriber email this coming week, so if you’re interested in being part of this adventure, join this list! And if you have any questions, just reply or comment and let me know.

Top Cartoons

Let’s wrap this all up by looking at the most popular cartoons in the past month. The top cartoon was this one (a repost, actually) about friendship.

If you want to give this cartoon to a friend, check out the options in my online store!

The second-most-popular cartoon was this one, inspired by my terrible memory. Based on people’s reactions, I see that I’m not alone in my struggles! But perhaps there is a silver lining…

OK, that’s it for now! Watch for a new Monday Motivation coming your way soon. I’m also working on a new Bowl Game story involving a piece of broccoli that has to face a reality he never expected. I’m hoping to have that story to you by next weekend.

Thank you, as always, for reading! Have a great week ahead!

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Your fortune: You will buy a bar of soap at a street fair, and later you’ll realize that the scent is “cinnamon roll.” Every time you use the soap, it will cause a commotion. You’ll walk into a room and people will stop what they’re doing and shout, “Is someone making cinnamon rolls?” “No!” you’ll say, “I just showered, and you’re smelling my soap.” But this will keep happening. Everywhere you go, people will freak out, thinking that cinnamon rolls are about to be offered to them. You should stop using the soap, but you can’t. It was expensive, and it offers some nice exfoliation. So you’ll progress through life constantly having to shout, “No! There are no cinnamon rolls!”